This blog is about me; a guy in his mid 30s (named Mingus) trying to deal with his pregnant wife (Chingus) and the journey around it.
Gosh! Where do i start!? There are couples who love & fight, but live happily together. There are those who love & separate. There are those who love, forget love & live together. And then there are those who love and grow mad about each other with each passing day for rest of their lives. We belong to the last mentioned category.
From our very early days in relationship, we were most happy when left alone. Even if that meant, being locked in a room with simple food, a movie & just two of us. We saw other couples enjoying more in common company & wondered if they were fools or we were crazy. We always avoided company, most times with silly stupid lies. Not much changed after marriage either. Now, this habit built a strange greed within us. Greed of not willing to share each other’s time with anyone else. Probably that was the major reason we were absolutely convinced about never having a baby.
Yup! You heard it right. We never ever wanted to have a baby. Not just me, but Chingus too. It was very mutual with 100% same intensity both sides. All the worldly reasons of having one seemed & sounded lame. It seemed as though everyone is following the course. Trying to fit in mold of ‘normal family life’. We were like “Why to have a baby? What purpose will it serve? Some people genuinely might love to have one, crave for one; but cant be so for every living adult on planet damn it! Atleast we had zero interest or craving, whatsoever! Having a baby would make us slaves to their schedules & liking for next 20-25 years!” etc etc. These were our thoughts.
The fear of being monitored & governed by another soul…who is compulsorily around all the time…was too intimidating. The freedom we enjoyed & treasured was too dear. We could smooch, cuddle & go south, anywhere around the house whenever we wanted. We may contend a dinner with just pop corn & left overs. We may bang & sleep when families are glued to boring soap operas or wake up when others collected their kids from bus stops. No place was unreachable, nobody to please, no one’s tantrum to tolerate (except our own) and no daily schedules basically.
Vacations were our own. No place was ‘mom am bored, lets go elsewhere!’. We could let our eyes rest on sea waves or let the brains soak in liquor & not suddenly yell “honey! wheres Chunmun?” A plate of daal-khichdi & some paracetamol would be enough to take care the worst of days! Booze would rule the order of day. Food could be endless junk and no fear of being role models…”Chunmun! enough chocolates! Now eat your meal…follow mommy papa”. And shopping at a mall would be such breeze….we may drop tried clothes on 2 foot soldiers around & never worry if we lost our own amidst the pile beside trial rooms.
Basically, we were just not willing to give up all such liberties. We absolutely madly loved & treasured our independence.
But then, nothing is permanent! Everything; good or bad has an end. So this too was to end. Who & how contributed to moving this mountain? Well, thats insignificant considering the Himalayan challenge we were about to take up. Still would like to put it to words in next post. Because the thought “lets think about having a baby” was a big deal in itself. For us atleast 🙂